But first let me take a selfie


(Article written exclusively for India Today)



The year is 2015. Homo sapiens have just about mastered the skill of using SMS lingo in oral conversations.

"Laugh and the world laughs at you, LOL and the world ROFLs / ROFLMAOs / LMFAOs at you (depending on their stage of human evolution)."

However, mankind is still struggling to come to terms with selfies. Back as a kid, life was a lot simpler. There was one Kodak camera in the house, and the internet was basically a medium with the sole purpose of getting to see plump green and blue MSN messenger icons rotate in circles, on loop. Pictures were clicked stingily and the people getting clicked were legally obligated to strike a flamboyant pose even if it was a funeral ceremony. The cheat codes of striking a good pose were perfected and passed on from one generation to the next.

Recently, at my college, we had a mock fire drill ie that part of the year where everyone is supposed to fake traumatised facial expressions (like the ones you get after seeing Mexican dosa on the Dosa Plaza restaurant chain menu), and also, tragically, the only part of the year where you compulsorily burn calories by taking the staircase for no noble intentions, but only because the lifts have been out of order.

For a change, I indulged in the much loved selfie craze and willingly became a part of about 40-60 group selfies during the six minute walk downstairs. This was pretty much like a social experiment for me. You know, like the ones you see on Facebook, where they run a car over a cat and check if a dead kitty evoked any public sympathy, with hidden cameras.

I was born with average looks and a gazillion or more diverse facial expressions than Arjun Ramp